Tough Topic: Homosexuality in Youth Ministry

I just returned from one of my favorite ministry locations in the United States.  The place is called The Pittsburgh Project and they are doing Kingdom B-I-(crooked letter)-I-N-E-(crooked letter, crooked letter) for sure!  Please visit the site to get more information about TPP.  However, as I preached a very interesting thing happened.  Well, it didn’t happen until after I made it home.  I received a letter that I’d like to share with you that a youth worker sent to me:

Dear Mr. Lynch;
 
Just wanted to thank you for speaking at the Pittsburgh Project this past weekend.  I especially enjoyed your closing talk and rapping! I think it sent a great message to all of us that were there to help out and get the most of the weekend.
 
We are a diverse adult group from ******* and took a little concern with something you said on Friday night. We just wanted to ask you this personally instead of trying to interpret it.  But while talking about marriage you mentioned, just make sure it's someone of the opposite sex, man and a women.  Was this just a joking around statement to be funny or is this your belief?
 
I checked out your website but wasn't able to find anything on this subject and wondered what your teachings to youth are about relationships and homosexuality?

Our church is very open and accepting of all people and I wanted to have a little more clarity about some of your views. 
 
Thank you for your time and commitment to youth!

Sincerely,
**************

Tough Topic

Now let me share the statement I originally made: “I’ve been married for the past 18 years, and I’ve figured out the secret of how to stay married for 18 years and be happy; you have to be married to your best friend…just make sure it’s a best friend of the opposite sex you know: a  man with a woman…”

Now what is funny is that I was trying to be funny.  This is a joke that I’ve used time and time again, and just like most evangelists, I have an arsenal of loaded jokes, favorite sayings and quotes that I carry with me at all times ready to use, so to me this was no different that any other time. However, this letter signified to me that the time HAS indeed changed because we now have people who hold strong to their opinions and beliefs regardless of what the church, or a preacher or a pastor may think. 

My concern ISN’T whether we as preachers and teachers should stand up for the truth, but I am concerned in how we communicate truth.  As Paul said, we must speak the truth in love as we preach sound doctrine.  My goal is to be sensitive to those who are struggling with issues and share truth in a way that always exposes and offers redemption.  In other words, I think we for too long in the city have alluded to certain sins like sexual disorientation with a ten foot pole without offering much language on how to escape.  I don’t want to just joke about ‘Homo’s’ at the expense of alienating them away from the possibility of freedom from their sin and shame.  So let me share with you the response that I sent back to this youth worker:

Hey *********;

Thanks so much for writing and expressing your concern.  Please know that your concern is heard, respected and appreciated.  I had a wonderful time at the Pittsburgh Project and always look forward to coming and participating in such an inspiring and alive organization as well as getting to meet the diverse groups of people who are committed to fleshing out kingdom principles that make a difference in the world. 

Concerning my comment Friday night on marriage; I do personally believe that homosexuality is a relational brokenness that can not be rectified through a marital union just as adultery would be a relational brokenness that would fall short of God's best and could not be made right by simply jumping out of one marriage into another: thus my comment.  Please let me say that you did really help me by bringing this to my attention, because I did not intend to jokingly marginalize anyone regardless of their belief, orientation or stand on this issue.  I hallow my calling and office of a communicator and seek to deal with such weighty matters in love and care, not trifling or with jokes.  Christ came to seek and save, not to point out and reject.  As Christ has commissioned me, my goal is to speak the truth in love and invite God's children to sanctum as we all pursue the wholeness that he provides.

God bless you ******* and thanks so much for asking my views. 

After reading your letter I assume that you may have a differing view on this very important matter, and I welcome any dialogue that you or your leadership would desire.  Thanks for loving kids and thanks for loving the city.

Fred Lynch

Tip from Fred:  Let’s elevate the conversation with the Gay Community

I’m not saying that I have all the answers, neither am I presenting my response as the best way to deal with those in the church who embrace homosexuality; I am sharing this letter because it was a huge eye opener to me personally of the times that we are living in.  To be honest, the letter also helped me see a side of myself that I must work on: I can no longer hide my discomfort with homosexuality behind broad brushed humor as if ‘nobody around me is gay, so I can get away with being rude’.  I’m not there yet by no means, I still have a lot of work to do, but I believe that this will be one of the biggest issues over the next 10 years, and if you haven’t began planning strategic ways of addressing sexuality among teens, then your head is in the sand!  Our teens are inundated with messages from society that fly in the face of their church and we must become a resource that equips, encourages and informs our teens.  There is a great book that I’d like you to check out this month, its titled: Love Is an Orientation by Andrew Marin.  He takes on the task of asking the Body of Christ to elevate the conversation with the Gay Community and offers some great ways to build and rebuild the bridge between the GLBT Community and the Church.  Because as tough as this topic is, there is no way that we can bring the cross-over into the GLBT Community unless we relationally build a bridge and restart a conversation that has redemption as the shining topic. 

For my freebie this month, I’d like to invite you to check out this brief article from Andrew Marin titled, “Connecting Homosexual Students to God’s Love”.  Enjoy.

Sharing the gospel from ‘Street to Street’

Fred D. Lynch III
GodStyle Productions

Fred Lynch is the founder of GodStyle Productions. A ministry committed to changing youth culture. For more information on Fred, go to www.godstyle.com or check out his latest project The Script (the gospel of John translated into rap) at: www.gettheepic.com .